Betty's Diary
by Nightstar2
Summary: The Crucible seen through Betty's eyes. She might not seem like she was important, but she had her own story to tell during the chaos in Salem. (English class project I had to do. Review if you like, but try to be nice when/if you do.)
1. Fun or Bad?

I played a fun game last night. At least I thought it were a game. Me and my cousin, Abby, went into the woods with many of the other girls from town to play with Papa's nice servant lady. Her name sounds like Tityoobuh. It be very hard to spell. I cannot spell anything good. Papa says nobody be allowed to write nor read because God says it be bad. I enjoy writin' because it helps me practice and I have been gettin' better. I do not want Papa to be mad at me, so I hide my writin' book from him and I write in it at night while he be sleepin'.

Tityoobuh's games be so much fun. She made a fire and we all danced while she sang a song with weird words and I liked to dance to it. I do not think my friend, Mercy, were doin' the dance right, because she just took off her clothes and ran 'round while she were naked. Tityoobuh made weird red stuff that Abby said were soup, but it smelled funny. I asked Tityoobuh if I could try it, but Abby yelled at me and said I could have none. I thought it were not fair that Abby got some and I did not till Tityoobuh said it were not for me because it came from cuttin' chickens. I think she meant she put chicken blood in the soup and that be why it were red. I wanted not to drink the funny soup no more. I knew not why Abby would want to drink it nor why the frog that jumped into the pot would want to drink it, either. I thought it were part of the game, so I kept playin' along. The weirdest part of the game were when Abby made a wish for Goody Proctor to die, and then she drank the blood soup. I started to think we were playin' a game where we were witches and Abby were castin' a spell to kill people like I heard people say that witches do. I knew not why Abby would want to play a game such as this, but I just kept goin' along with it. We played and danced till Papa found us. He looked mad and I do not like when he be mad. I thought he were mad because we were pretendin' to be witches and he does not like when others talk 'bout witches. I got scared and I think I fainted.

I believe I awoke the next day layin' on my bed and I could hear Papa talkin' to Abby next to me. He sounded like he were mad at Abby. I thought it were because we were pretendin' to be witches, so he might have still been mad at me and I wanted not for him to yell at me, so I pretended to still be asleep. A few minutes later, I heard Mister and Misses Putnam come in. I think I heard them say I could fly, because they said I went over Ingersoll's barn like a bird. I found that to be weird. Then, they started to talk 'bout witchcraft and I started to think that it were part of the game from the other night and Papa and Mister and Misses Putnam were playin' along. They were pretendin' that I were a under a spell made by a witch and that be why I would not wake and why I could fly. I thought it were strange that we were still playin' the game, but I still liked it and I were glad that Papa were only pretendin' to be mad. Or at least I thought he were.

My friends, Mercy Lewis and Mary Warren, came in and everyone else except for Abby left and they started talkin' 'bout witches, too. From what they were talkin' 'bout, I thought they were the witches that casted the sleep and fly spell on me. I did not like the way they were yellin' at each other and it made me whimper a little. Abby heard me and made me sit up and tried to make me wake. When she threatened me, I got scared and whimpered again. I thought she were tryin' to tell me that it were time for me to wake because that were part of the game. I got off of the bed and leaned against a wall, pretendin' to be scared of Abby, the witch. I started talkin' 'bout flyin' to my passed Mama, since I could fly in the game. I were goin' to pretend to fly up to heaven to see Mama. Abby stopped me from climbin' out the window to fly, even though I were only goin' to pretend to because I knew it were dangerous. I thought it would be fun to pretend to be a scared victim who wanted to tell others what were happenin', so I talked 'bout what Abby did last night, pretendin' to be scared. Abby kept tellin' me that none of that happened. I started gettin' more scared when Abby slapped my face. She did not fake the slap like I thought she would and it hurt. I still tried to play along with the game because I wanted her not to keep yellin' at me. I fell onto my bed and pretended to cry, yellin' to my Mama, tellin' her to come for me and save me from the witches. That seemed to only make it worse because Abby started yellin' at me, Mercy, and Mary; I were too scared of her tone of voice to understand her. I were so scared, I fainted again.

It took not as long for me to wake as the last time I fainted, because I woke up to yellin' and a song bein' played downstairs. I liked the song, but I did not like the shoutin'. I started whinin' and coverin' my ears, hopin' to block out the loud noise. I were so sick of all the yellin' that I started to scream. Persons started to surround me and yell in confusion, wonderin' what were wrong with me. I stopped screamin' and I felt someone lightly slap me, tryin' to get me to wake. I did not want Abby to yell at me again, so I just kept my eyes closed and moaned from the pain in my ears. I were confused. I were startin' to think that this not be a game at all. Did they truly believe that I were under a witch's spell? I wanted not for them to be mad at me for fakin' my illness, even though I were only pretendin', so I continued to lay there and stopped listenin' to everyone in the room.

More and more persons started comin' in and a man named John Hale tried to wake me, but I were payin' not any attention to anyone till Tityoobuh came in. They asked her 'bout what happened the other night. They believed that she were the witch that made me sleep. I wanted to tell them not to be mad at her, but I also wanted not for them to be mad at me. She told them 'bout what happened in the woods. Abby called her a liar and said such awful things 'bout her. The persons in the room started sayin' that Tityoobuh needed to be killed. I opened my eyes and were 'bout to get out of the bed to go over to Tityoobuh and defend her when she started talkin' 'bout the Devil tryin' to tempt her. I thought not that she were tellin' the truth and that she just went along with what everyone believed she were so they would not be mad at her. It be like what I did when I thought I were playin' the game or when everyone thought I were under the spell. I realized that Tityoobuh needed not my help, so I closed my eyes and went back to pretendin' to be asleep, glad that nobody was lookin' at me when I opened them.

I heard Tityoobuh say the names of persons that were with the Devil to make the lie more real and to make everyone not be mad at her no more. Soon, Abby started sayin' names, too. I assume they were mad at her, as well. I thought I could say the names of others that were with the Devil, so nobody would be mad at me, either. I sat up and started sayin' random names. I cared not for who they were as long as Papa would not be mad at me no more. It seemed to have worked, because when I got up, Papa came over to me and hugged me. I were happy that he were not mad at me, but I kept sayin' random names so Papa would be too focused on the witches that Abby and I were accusin' to bring up the incident from the other night and be mad at me and Tityoobuh again. I am still scared. I know not what will happen, but I have a feelin' that it be something bad.


	2. I Am a Poppet

I wish I did not join Abby and our friends in that charm makin' dance. Now, I have to follow her along with everything. Everyone thinks I were cursed by a witch and Abby keeps tellin' others that there be many other witches in town. Accusin' persons whenever she can just because she does not want persons to hate her. Cannot say I put blame on her. I were doin' the same thing, but a little differently. It not be my fault, either. I only thought we were playin' a game. And now, because of that game, Abby, Mary, Mercy, many other girlsI had to stand in court while persons I know were bein' yelled at for bein' accused of bein' witches. I know they be innocent, but I also know that Abby does not want me to tell no one 'bout it. I have to listen to her now, or she will hurt me as she did the last time I tried to tell everyone 'bout what she did, while thinkin' we were playin' the game.

Reverend Hale asked us questions 'bout the persons on trial for bein' witches. The trials were held in the church. Almost everyone in town were there. Abby, Mary, Mercy, the other girls, and I sat near the front, because we were supposed to be the witnesses of the witches in town. I stayed quiet for most of the time, because I did not want no one to get hurt. While I were sittin' with the girls, I noticed Mary sowin' a poppet. I wonder how she could have managed to be calm enough to keep her hands steady enough to work the needle during a trial that could mean the death of innocent persons. So many persons have been arrested and mentioned in the court. I regret sayin' all of those names after I stopped pretendin' to be sick. Now, there be persons that will hang.

Sarah Good and Goody Osburn were a few of the many women that were brought into the court. Goody Osburn is to hang and Sarah Good confessed to save herself. It be somewhat relievin' to know that some of the accused will not die, but it helps nothing to sooth my conscience. I also had to go along with Abby's acts during court to make it seem like the accused truly were witches. When Sarah Good stood at her trial, Abby started holdin' her neck as if someone were tryin' to choke her. The other girls and I did as she did, sayin' Sarah's spirit were tryin' to kill us. I hated makin' everyone believe innocent persons were tryin' to hurt us, but I had not any choice. If I were to tell them the truth, not only would Abby be furious with me, but everyone would hate me for lyin' 'bout bein' ill. After our act of chokin', Sarah Good supposedly confessed that she sometimes made a compact with Lucifer, and wrote her name in his black book with her blood and bound herself to torture Christians till God's thrown down and we all must worship Hell forevermore. I found that to be the scariest lie I had ever heard. I am glad that she will not hang, however.

Of course, Abby is the one who accused Goody Proctor of workin' with the Devil. Abby wants her dead. I thought she were just playin' when she made that charm, but I know now that she be plottin' to kill Goody Proctor for reasons I know nothing of. Goody Proctor is one of the kindest of the women I have ever met. I thank Mary for claimin' she never saw the woman's spirit come at her and nobody questioned 'bout her no more. I pray that no one else will have to suffer from this spread of cruel rumors.

I deeply regret goin' with Abby into the forest. I wish I had never danced 'round that fire. If only I had known we were not playin' a game. I should have told Papa 'bout the cruel things Abby had done to me and the other girls. I wish I could tell someone other than my writin' book 'bout what be happenin' instead of actin' as Abby's poppet. I hate Abby. Mama may cry if she heard me say this, but I deeply hate Abby for the things she be doin' and what she may be plannin' to do. I also hate myself for fallin' into her cruel plot. By dancin' with her as she made the charm, I have made a compact with Abby. By pretendin' to be bewitched, I have bound myself to torture the innocent of my beloved home till Abby gets what she wants and I must keep my unwanted secret forevermore.


	3. Slave of Fear

Everything have gone from bad to worse. Countless numbers of innocent persons have hanged. More are to hang and I fear that the hangin' will never end. I heard from Papa that Goody Nurse and Goody Proctor have been arrested for bein' accused of witchcraft. Why would anyone even think of such kind and innocent women doin' anything harmful to anyone? I wish I could tell someone 'bout the lies that have tainted my home and taken the lives of many. My fear of Abby keeps me from sayin' a single word to anyone. I fear for my own name and well being more than I fear for the lives of others and that makes me selfish. Today, I were close to findin' the courage to speak the truth, but my fear got the better of me again.

The girls and I were called to attend another trial. There were not as many girls as before. There were only Mercy, Abby, Susanna, and me. We were asked to wait in the court till they called us in. I still feared for what others would think if I confessed my false witness, but I were intended to tell them 'bout Abby's lies, even if she would hurt me for disobeyin' her. I would not let anymore of the innocent die. Mister Cheever came in and escorted us to the vestry room. I had my head down as we walked into the room. We were told to sit down and we obeyed. I lifted my head up for a moment and I saw Mary and Mister Proctor near the front of the room and I could see Mary were cryin'. Governor Danforth told us that Mary confessed to never seein' spirits. I were a little happy for a moment that I may have not needed to confess Abby's lies, till he told us that liars are to be damned. My heart sank and my fear rose again. He claimed that what Mary had said might have been what the Devil told her to say and if we did not confess that what she said were true, she would hang.

Abby were questioned of Mary's claims and she told nothing but lies. They talked 'bout the poppet Mary made during the last trial and Abby denied seein' her make it. I knew not what the poppet had to do with witchcraft, but I listened not any further. I could bare no more lies and I feared that if I confessed, it would make no difference. Mary had confessed and yet they believed her not. They only believed Abby. I wanted to tell them that Abby were lyin', but they would not listen to me if I did. I could do nothing, so I tried listenin' to nothing else. I started to think 'bout what the Governor said. I were to be damned for lyin' when I did it against my own will and knowledge. I can only hope that God may have some pity for me.

I continued to ignore the voices of the room as I kept to my own thoughts. A few minutes later, Abby started shiverin' as if she were cold as she looked at Mary. Mercy did the same as Abby and so did Susanna. I knew then that they were claimin' Mary to be a witch. I started doin' what Abby were doin' as I have done ever since all of this started. Out of nowhere, Mister Proctor grabbed Abby and started callin' her something that I promised Mama I would not ever repeat in words nor writin'. He told the court 'bout what he and Abby did many months ago. I were horrified by what he claimed to have done. Adultery be one of the worst crimes of the Bible ever known. In that moment were when everything started to make sense. Abby were in love with Mister Proctor, but she could not be with him due to the bond of marriage between him and Goody Proctor. She believed that if Mister Proctor were to become a widow, she could have him to herself. That be how this madness started. She wanted what she could not have and it made her greedy.

The Governor told Papa to bring in Goody Proctor. After Papa left, the Governor instructed Abby and Mister Proctor to turn 'round and that none of us were to talk at all. Goody Proctor came in and the Governor asked her questions 'bout Abby and Mister Proctor. I gave not much attention to what they were speakin' of till the Governor harshly grabbed Goody Proctor's face and asked her if what Mister Proctor had said 'bout his claim of commitin' adultery were true. She denied it. I knew not if she were tellin' the truth, if she had no knowledge of Mr. Proctor's affair, or if she were lyin' for him. Goody Proctor were taken away after that.

Reverend Hale tried to defend Mister Proctor's Claim when Abby started to scream what sounded like nonsense and pointed at something on the ceiling that were not there. The other girls and I followed her. Abby claimed she were talkin' to Mary in the form of a bird and she copied whatever words came from Mary. I did as she did with the other girls. Whatever Mary said and did, we would repeat as if we were under a spell. I could not believe that we were tryin to get Mary hanged. She were more innocent than anyone. She be the kindest girl I know and a good friend to me. Abby had gone so far as to accuse one of our own friends just to make sure her plan to claim Mister Proctor as her own would not be interrupted. Abby screamed as if the imaginary bird were goin' to attack her and we screamed, as well. Mary screamed with us as if she were a victim of the bird as well. She started makin' an accusation at Mister Proctor. I knew then that she were back to doin' what Abby said. Mary went cryin' to Abby.

Mister Proctor were asked if what Mary said were true. What he said next almost made me cry. God is dead, he said. He said it with such fierce that I almost thought that it were his actual belief. After that, Mister Proctor were taken away with Mister Giles. I know not why Mister Giles were arrested. I were not listenin' to them before we came into the room. My hate for Abby have increased after that. She be responsible for the deaths of almost everyone I know. I hope God will give her a rightful punishment.


	4. Alone Or Maybe Not

My home no longer feels like home. Most of the persons I have come to know be either dead or on the path to death. Mister Proctor and Goody Nurse were hanged this mornin'. Mister Giles be dead as well. I know not what the fate of Goody Proctor be. I heard her life were spared because of the child she now carries. I do hope they will never hang her and will allow the child to grow with its mother. I cannot imagine growin' without the knowledge of who my mother and father were. I have already lost Mama, and I fear that I may be losin' Papa now.

Papa have been depressed ever since Abby disappeared. She stayed a night at Mercy's house and neither Abby nor Mercy have been seen since. Papa asked me if I had heard any word of her or any mention of where she would have gone. I told him 'bout listenin' to Abby and Mercy talk 'bout leavin' on a ship a week ago. I thought they were goin' to visit someone, so I believed it were not important. I am glad that Abby be gone, but Papa be sad. I thought it were because he missed her till I found that his strongbox were broken. Nobody touches Papa's strongbox. I tried to touch it once and Papa yelled at me. He be sad because someone robbed him. I think it were Abby. A few nights ago, I awoke to a noise and girls whisperin' downstairs. I thought one of the voices sounded like Abby, but I were too tired to care and the next morning, I passed it off as a dream. I feel bad for Papa. I hope he does not stay sad for long. I am mad that Abby stole from him and I hope she never comes back. However, her absence does nothing to repair the damage that were done here.

I have been lonely since this madness started. No one have bothered to talk to me when I have needed someone other than my writin' book to tell my troubles to. I refused to speak with Abby, Mercy were too busy assistin' Mister and Goody Putnam with their sick daughter, Mary barely talks to me anymore, I could not talk to Papa nor any of the other adults because of Abby's secret, and Tityoobuh still be in jail. I thought she would be left alone after her confession, but she were arrested soon after I stopped pretendin' to be sick. Because she still be in jail, we have no servant lady to help with the house work, so Papa tells me to do some of the things Tityoobuh would do. This morning, before Papa left the house to go to the jailhouse, he asked me to get some milk from one of the farmers in town. The cow farm were near the jailhouse, so we walked there together. As we walked, I asked Papa if Tityoobuh were comin' back to work for us. He said she would not. I thought that meant she no longer works for us. When we arrived at the jailhouse, Papa told me to get the milk and that he would meet me back at the house.

I went to get the milk in a bucket that I brought with me. The farmer gave me permission to milk the cow myself. Tityoobuh taught me to do it not too long ago. After I had gotten the milk in the bucket, I heard some persons talkin' through a window of the jailhouse. I could not hear what they were sayin' very well, but I recognized some of the voices. The two women talkin' were Goody Good and Tityoobuh. A man were talkin' to them. I wanted to go over to them and say hello to Tityoobuh and tell her that I missed her and possibly ask the man when she would be released. I walked closer to the window and I saw a man drag Tityoobuh out of the cell as she shouted to the window, telling the Devil to take her home, as if the cow in front of me were the Devil. Neither Tityoobuh nor the man saw me standin' near the cow. I were confused at first. Why would Tityoobuh say something such as that? She said she would not consult with the Devil no more, even though she lied 'bout seein' the Devil at all. I thought for a moment and then I realized that she were ravin' madness because she knew she were goin' to meet her fate. She were goin' to be hanged. I thought she would be forgiven after she confessed, but I were wrong. Papa knew she were goin' to die and he did not have the heart to tell me. In that moment, I realized how alone I were. Tityoobuh were my only true friend I had left and she were 'bout to meet with death. I had no one. Mercy be gone, Papa never talks to me, Mary be too scared of Papa to come near my house anymore, and nobody else seems to have the time for me. After a few moments, which seemed to be hours to me, I dropped the bucket, spillin' all of the milk within it, and ran into the forest as I broke into sobs and tears.

I came to the same place that the other girls and I came to when I thought we were playin' the witch game. I hated this place because it be where all of the madness started, but it were the only place in the woods I could go to without gettin' lost. I cried as I sat on the ground. I were in despair. I had no friends, no Mama, and I hardly had my Papa. I were alone. I have been alone for so long and nobody could understand what I were feelin'. I stayed in the forest and cried for what must have been hours, because I could see the sun risin'. Papa must have come home and realized I were missin' by then. I cared not. All I wanted were to stay and mourn for all of the losses I had gone through. I knew I could not stay there for long. Papa would send a party for me soon.

I continued to cry till I heard leaves rustlin' and twigs snappin' behind me. I knew I had been found. I wiped away my tears and got up to fix my dress the best I could. I turned 'round, expectin' a scoldin' from a man for worryin' Papa. The person I saw were not a man. It were Mary Warren. I had not seen her since she accused Mister Proctor of witchcraft. I had been ignorin' her because she were the one responsible for Mister Proctor's death sentence and I would not forgive her for that. She kindly asked me what I were doin' way out there and if I were cryin'. I could not hide the sadness on my face nor could I keep the tears from comin' back. I broke into uncontrollable sobs and fell on my knees. Mary came over and kneeled by me, askin' me if I were alright in her normal worried voice. I told her that Tityoobuh were dead. She took me in her arms and said she were sorry. She knew how much Tityoobuh meant to me. I returned her embrace, realizin' that I have had not a single hug since the day Tityoobuh were arrested. I desperately needed a hug, and I needed someone to cry to even more.

I were glad that I finally had someone to talk to. Mary and I were good friends before the madness started. Would play games at her house when Papa were not home. She had been keepin' to herself since all of this started. I missed her. She be a good friend. I thought I did not like her no more because she accused Mister Proctor, but I could not put blame on her for doin' that. She were tryin' to save herself. I had also noticed that she seemed to have been scared of Mister Proctor. Perhaps she accused him because he had been hurtin' her and she were angry with him. She wanted him gone, just as I wanted Abby gone. I could not hate her. She be my friend. My only friend as of now. Mary helped me off of the ground and told me that it were time to go home. I followed her back to town. Now, I am not so lonely anymore.


End file.
